Sense Project

Here are a couple of questions and answers we got recently in our anonymous questions box to the right ->  Great questions about pregnancy risks and birth control pills!  Hope this helps, and keep ‘em coming…

Q: can you get pregnant if a guy fingers you with sperm on his hand?

For pregnancy to occur, sperm has get inside the vagina or on the vulva (where semen could be pushed into the vagina through intercourse, touching etc.). If someone has semen on their hand, and it is still wet, and then fingers someone else, then yes, there is a pregnancy risk there. However, sperm have a hard time surviving once the semen has dried up, so pregnancy is pretty unlikely if the person had semen on their hand that had dried up. Either way, there are a few ways you can reduce this risk: hand-washing is a quick and easy way to make sure there’s no remaining ejaculate around, or use gloves and lube for fingering. If you’re concerned about pregnancy in general, check out this post for some different birth control ideas. The more you know about your body and how pregnancy happens, the better!

Q: My boyfriend is moving away for a year, and we won’t be seeing each other much. Is it safe for me to stop taking birth control for the year he is away, and then start again when he comes back? Are there bad side effects from going off the pill?

The Pill is a reversible form of contraception – meaning that once you stop taking it, your body resumes its natural cycles and you are able to get pregnant. It’s safe to stop taking it whenever you want to stop taking it, just remember that it may take awhile for your body to adjust. When you first go on the Pill, your body is adjusting to the new levels of hormones in your system. Read the rest of this entry »

Are you interested in facilitating sex ed workshops with youth? Do you want to contribute to the Sense Project at Head & Hands? We are currently seeking new volunteer animators for the 2011-12 school year!

Some need-to-know info about applying to be a Sense Project animator:

• New animators must be aged 25 and under
• We’re looking for people who can commit to being an animator for the entire school year (Sept-early Dec, Jan-May)
• Animators should have at least some availability on weekdays during the day. Last year’s animators volunteered an average of 70 hours each throughout the school year, but how much you end up volunteering depends on your schedule and your availability.
• Bilingualism is not mandatory, but it’s an asset if you are comfortable animating in French. The working language of the training is English.
• It is also an asset if you have previous animation experience or experience working with youth, but it’s not a requirement.
• It is mandatory to attend the full animator training (see dates below).

Animator training dates:

Tuesday Sept. 6^th 6-9pm

Thursday Sept. 8^th 6-9pm

Saturday Sept. 10^th 11-4pm

Tuesday Sept. 13^th 6-9pm

Thursday Sept. 15^th 6-9pm

Saturday Sept. 17^th 11-4pm

Tuesday Sept. 20^th 6-9pm

Thursday Sept. 22^nd 6-9pm

Saturday Sept. 24^th 11-4pm

If you meet these criteria, download the volunteer application form send it to Nikki at healthed@headandhands.ca by Wednesday, August 10^th. We’ll then book a short screening interview with selected volunteers. If you have any questions, feel free to call Nikki at (514) 481-0277!

Sense animator Emily learned all about IUDs at last year's training!

Tags: sense project, sense project animators, sex education, volunteer

Q: Where can I get free condoms in Montreal?

A: You can get free condoms here at Head & Hands (5833 Sherbrooke St. Ouest) - see our website for our opening hours, or call our streetworkers who always have them on hand!  You can also get them at CLSCs (find your nearest CLSC here), at many schools/CEGEPs/universities (try the nurse’s office or health services, guidance counsellor or social worker), and at other community organizations or youth centres, like AIDS Community Care Montreal, Rezo, Dans la rue/Pops van, or Head & Hands’ teen drop-in centre, J2K. Concordia’s 2110 Centre for Gender Advocacy and McGill’s Union for Gender Empowerment also stock condoms and other safer sex supplies.  Happy searching!

We are still getting more and more questions in our “Ask Anything” question box to the right! –> Sense volunteer Liam tackled today’s question…

Q: My boyfriend and I are planning our first time. I’ve been looking into birth control and trying to figure out which one will be best, but besides that, we’re both virgins and neither of us really know what to expect. I want this to be special. Advice?

After much time spent dwelling on what I would say to two people about to have sex for the first time, I was able to narrow my characteristic longwindedness down to 3 topics: Communication/Consent; Safer Sex/Birth Control; Pleasure.

–Communication/Consent—

Communicating about sex is really a win-win: you can make sure that your partner is consenting and into it as well as maximize the pleasure of everybody involved. From a super practical standpoint, communicating might look like saying things along the lines of “is it cool if I take off your pants”, “oh my god, what you just did felt amazing”, “Could you go a little slower”, “Stop for a second, I need a break”, or seriously a bazillion other things. I generally shy away from making sweeping generalizations BUT sex will probably be better if you know that your partner is listening and responding to you and would stop as soon you asked. To make communicating easier, some people like to use code words that you and your partner can come up with beforehand. A really common set is the traffic light system where ‘green’ means everything is fantastic, ‘yellow’ means turn it down a bit, and ‘red’ means stop immediately. Coming up with code words can also be a helpful way to start a conversation about sex, consent, and boundaries with your partner.

Read the rest of this entry »

Sydney, Sense animator extraordinaire, makes another guest appearance to answer your anonymous questions! Thanks, Sydney!

Q: How do I give more enjoyment to my husband?

First off, I want to say that your enjoyment is just as important to this equation as your husband’s. Everyone has a sex drive and everyone has the right to experience pleasure. Sex is best when both people are into it!

Secondly, I must say that there’s no one (or even two or three) answer(s) to this. My main suggestion would be to communicate! Spend some time thinking about what sex acts turn you on and what you’re comfortable doing. Brainstorm a few ideas about what might be enjoyable for you and your husband. Think about your fantasies and what you want out of sex. Then sit down with your husband over coffee or a glass of wine or a meal or whatever. Tell him your fantasies. Ask him what his are. Discuss ways to make them a reality. If things get awkward or uncomfortable, maybe take a break. Be prepared to give him some time to do some thinking as well and then set a time in the near future that works for both of you to come back and talk about things.

As far as detailed suggestions about different things you can try and how to go about doing them, there are way too many options to discuss here. Internet research can be helpful, but remember to take everything you read there with a grain of salt. There’s a great - and quite detailed! - article over on Scarleteen that describes the anatomy of pleasure and which of our body parts can make us feel really good! There are also a lot of great books out there that you can find at many bookstores or even the library sometimes. My favorite is The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex. It talks about a wide range of topics related to sex, offers tips on how to make each sex act more enjoyable for both people, and is a super easy and fun read. There’s something in it for everyone, regardless of gender, sexuality, and sexual preferences.

Keep in mind that the idea of what “good sex” is is different for everyone. Also, you and/or your husband may be into one thing one night and a totally different thing the next. Communication is an ongoing process. Keep talking with each other in different ways and different times. Some of the best discussions happen when you’re not in bed, but offering suggestions and checking in with the other person are also important before, during, and after sex. As a general rule, the more you talk about it, the more comfortable you will be and the better the sex will be.