Sense Project

Here is a “mash-up” clip of Killing Us Softly 3 with Jean Kilbourne. It’s definitely worth watching the whole thing but this will give you a good summary of what the talk is about:

Tags: Advertising, Body image, Femininity, feminism, Gender, Jean Kilbourne, Killing Us Softly 3, Masculinity, sexuality

Hi folks! Just wanted to let you know that during the month of February, Sense Project’s “e-division” will be tackling the topic of body image.

As stated in our lovely Peer Education Manual, “body image is how we feel about our physical selves and how we think others see us. Our body image is influenced by our family, our friends, the media and society in general. It’s influenced by what we think  we ‘should’ look like in order to be attractive and how we think our bodies ‘should’ perform”(p.227).

Of course, having a poor body image has an impact on a person’s sexuality. Here are a few points to consider:

-It can make us settle for unsuitable partners and unhealthy relationships because we don’t think we deserve to be treated with kindness and respect.

-It can make us use sex as a way of feeling “good enough”.

-It can lead us to take sexual risks in order to feel desirable.

-It can interfere with pleasure by bringing up feelings of inadequacy and shame.

-It can make us waste a lot of time, effort and money trying to be something we’re not, while neglecting our own unique qualities (Peer Education Manual, p. 227).

Therefore, this month is an opportunity for all of us to resist “negative-trashing” beliefs and promote inclusive “body-positive” messages.

Cheers!

Sexual orientation: Some people say “sexuality” when they mean “sexual orientation,” as in, “What’s your sexuality?” What they may mean is “Who are you attracted to?” and that can be a very complicated question. Generally, the person asking the question expects one of four answers: that you’re straight, gay, lesbian or bisexual. But there are lots of answers, and while some are a little less common, none are wrong.

Straight or Heterosexual: These mean the same thing - a sexual and romantic attraction to people of the “opposite” or different gender from yourself (example: a woman attracted to men). Hetero- is a prefix meaning “other,” “different.” Straight is slang for heterosexual. But gender is much more complex than just “man” vs. “woman.” 

Homosexual or Queer*: Homo- is a prefix meaning “same,” and so homosexual means a sexual and romantic attraction to people of the same gender as yourself (example: a boy who likes boys). The word queer was originally used to insult homosexual people, but now many people call themselves queer as a way of reclaiming the word from its negative meaning. It’s a symbol of pride or power instead of shame. Queer is also used to describe folks who are attracted to a wide variety of people, and not necessarily based on gender. Some people are more comfortable using the word queer (instead of lesbian, for example) because it doesn’t restrict gender.

Lesbian or Dyke*: Historically, “lesbian” meant a woman who is attracted to/has relationships with other women. The word dyke, like queer, used to be an insult but is now used in a positive way, mostly by younger homosexual women. Boudicca (pronounced boo-dyke-ah) was a Celtic queen who organized a revolt against the Roman Empire in 67 A.D. Since Boudicca was a powerful woman, many lesbians feel empowered by the label dyke.

Gay or Fag*: The word gay is sometimes used as a label for all homosexual people, but more specifically it means a man who is attracted to/has relationships with other men. Like queer and dyke, fag was originally an insult but has recently been reclaimed. These days, many younger gay men call themselves fags in a completely positive way.

Bisexual: Being bisexual is a sexual orientation all on its own. It means a sexual and romantic attraction to people of both genders. Sometimes bisexuals use the word queer to describe themselves. Heterosexual and homosexual people often harass bisexual people because they don’t fit into one box or the other. Some people are uncomfortable with the idea that there are other options besides being born straight or gay.

Some myths about bisexuals: 1) They just can’t make up their minds! 2) They’re obsessed with sex and want to have sex with everyone all the time! Neither is true. It’s possible to be attracted to both women and men, maybe at different times in one’s lifetime, or maybe all the time. And it certainly isn’t wrong!

Pansexual: This word means something very similar to bisexual, but without dividing people into two sexes or genders. The prefix bi- means two, but the prefix pan- means all - pansexuals are attracted to/seek out relationships with folks of all genders.

PSST… An important note about saying “queer”, “dyke” or “fag”: these labels are still offensive and hurtful to many people, so it’s REALLY important not to use them unless you’re CERTAIN that the person you’re referring to is okay with you using the label in that particular situation. Many people aren’t cool with these labels at all and others are only comfortable with them in certain situations. It’s simple respect to avoid unwanted or offensive labels.

All this information and more can be found in our awesome Peer Education Manual.

Since i’m doing stuff on what to do when you are drawn to someone and how to seduce, why not talk about pick up lines! In my french post, i talked about why guys sometimes don’t take no for an answer and how difficult it is to negociate things like consent and condom use.  Before all of this, there is the nightmarish first talk, first impression step that you don’t want to miss if you want to see her/him again.

This is intented to be funny, first because i am not sure if anywone would fall for such lines, even though they have been listed as how many times they were tried and how many time they had worked, some with surprisingly high scores. Second because those are not intended to use on a date or invite someone to a date (if you ever want to have a positive answer) but more in bars/club where trying to pick up a one night stand.

Laugh on this and think of how you would get someone’s attention better thant this!

They are divided into categories and at the end there is two numbers. The first one is the attempt number, the second one is how many time it worked.

Straight to the point : obvious and sometimes too much

Didn’t anyone  tell you that you wanted to sleep with me ?? I though you knew…  12 -1

This is a condom. If we put it on, we can have sex. 3-1

You’ve been a bad, bad girl(boy). Go to my room! 10-5

Excuse me. My friend over there is a little embarrassed. She’d like your phone number. She wants to know where she can get a hold of me in the morning. 10-8

Cheesy : too cheesy

I didn’t know that angels could fly so low ! 20-5

Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off? 5-1

It’s my birthday! How about a birthday kiss? (Is it really your birthday?) No, but how about a kiss anyway? 5-5

(hold out hand) Would you hold this for me while I go for a walk?  never tried

Your legs must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all night. 3-0

WHAT ?!: Yep, this is the right category name (and those are the less offensive…)

Hey, Laura! (Big hug). I haven’t seen you forEVER!! (huge kiss) Wow, you’ve really changed! (I’m not Laura) What? Oh my God, you even changed your name!  101-31

Are my undies showing? Answer: “No.” You: “Would you like them to? 1-0

Really like your peaches, wanna shake your tree. Never tried

Excuse me, but does this smell like chloroform to you? Never tried

Just plane lame : please nooo

Excuse me, but you have a beep on your nose. What? (Reach up and gently squeeze her nose) BEEP! 7-0

Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you. 4-0

Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours? 6-0

I just shit into my pants. Can I get into yours? 4- minus 3

Which one of the Spice girls are you? 54-2

Top lines that have been tried and worked (somehow i just can’t understand why)

Greetings and salivations 15-10

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? 14-10

The only thing your eyes haven’t told me is your name. 13-13

I bet you $20 you’re gonna turn me down.15-13

You’re so hot, your ass is on fire. 15-12

Have you always been this cute, or did you have to work at it? 10-7

[Look at her shirt label.] When they say, “What are you doing?” You respond: “Yep! Made in heaven!” 30-30

You can look moore at http://linesthataregood.com/

Some are juste plane wrong and offensive, others are rather cute, its up to you to make your own opinion about this! Feel free to comment on how you would react if someone would ask some of those questions!

TEENAGERS MAKING THEIR VOICES HEARD ON SEXUALITY?  DEFINITELY!

A group of teenagers from Toronto produced their own documentary about sexuality and pressure amongst adolescents, called It’s a Teen’s World: Wired for Sex, Lies and Power Trips.

Their opinions were taken so seriously that it was even shown on CTV.

This by teens - for teens video is GREAT!

Here is the trailer for the documentary:

Teen World

If you liked this trailer, you can watch the whole documentary online at:

http://www.cbc.ca/documentaries/passionateeyeshowcase/2009/teensworld/index.html

They also have an AWESOME website: http://www.itsateensworld.com

Hope you will enjoy it as much as I did!!